With the help of avocado extracts, I am certain that we can - and will - build a better mermaid. One with a sleeker, smoother midline transition from fish to woman. A more ethereal and striking mermaid - far less folksy. A mermaid for today's modern era. The kind your parents would scarcely abide. The New Mermaid will have panache, a political agenda, and a more pleasant aroma. The politics of the New Mermaid will be millennial and related, if only distantly, to the almond tree, when in bloom.
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